LOL-Jokes.com - news of the weird

15 things to do on a bus

Thu, 18 Aug 2005 02:37:16 -0700

1. Pretend you are saving the seat next to you for your
invisible friend, and if anyone tries to sit on the seat,
scream, "Don't sit on Jake!"
2. When someone tries to get on the bus

Political Correctness at it's Worst

Sat, 13 Aug 2005 07:40:03 -0700

Some excerpts from the Quarterly Review of Doublespeak

(NCTE)

A reader reports that when the patient died, the attending doctor recorded the following on the patient's chart: "P

Falling Times

Thu, 04 Aug 2005 07:07:37 -0700

Approximate time it would take you to drop from the top of Mount Everest: 2 1/2 minutes from the top of the Empire State Building: 10 seconds from the top of the Great Pyramid in Gi

A week of bad days (almost)

Sat, 16 Jul 2005 00:38:21 -0700

1. The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild a

Don't judge by appearances

Wed, 29 Jun 2005 21:00:18 -0700

This is NOT a true story, but it's a good read. . .A lady in a faded gingham dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun threadbare suit, stepped off the train in Boston, and walked timid

Journalism

Tue, 28 Jun 2005 23:37:05 -0700

Jon Snow: "In a sense, Deng Xiaoping's death was inevitable, wasn't it?"

Expert: "Er, yes."

(Channel 4 News)

"As Phil De Glanville said, each game is unique, an

The Top 12 Pick-Up Lines Used by News Anchors

Sun, 19 Jun 2005 20:24:16 -0700

12> How would you like to go live to the scene of the action?11> Can I buy you a dink? Wait -- I'm sorry. Hey, Harry, will you please fix that damn cue card?!?10> Would you like to go back to my place

British Left Waffles on Falkland

Thu, 02 Jun 2005 14:02:12 -0700

British Left Waffles on Falkland islands Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms Eye Drops off Shelf Teacher Strikes Idle Kids Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead

Christmas Tree

Sun, 29 May 2005 05:46:35 -0700

A guy farted in a elevator. He took out an air freshner. Another
guy got on the elevator. The first guy asked" What do you think
of the smell?" The second guy anwsered," It smells like som

Paying Taxes Government style

Wed, 25 May 2005 00:11:22 -0700

There was a man who computed his taxes for 1997 & found that he owed $3407.He packaged up his payment & included this letter:Dear IRS:Enclosed is my 1997 Tax Return & payment. Please t

Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe

Sun, 08 May 2005 17:52:55 -0700

Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe Out LiteracyAutos Killing 110 a Day--Let's Resolve to Do Better20-Year Friendship Ends at AltarWar Dims Hope For PeaceIf Strike Isn't Settle

Stupid Car Theif

Thu, 28 Apr 2005 01:14:28 -0700

A woman was reporting her car as stolen, and mentioned that there was a car phone in it. The policeman taking the report called the phone, and told the guy that answered that he had read the ad in the

Who really pays for the toys????

Sat, 23 Apr 2005 19:39:16 -0700

A man returning home a day early from a business trip, got into a taxi at the airport after midnight, and while enroute to his home, asked the driver if he would be a witness, as he suspected his wife

Ban Dihydrogen Monoxide!!!

Sat, 16 Apr 2005 16:33:38 -0700

A freshman at Eagle Rock Junior High won first prize at the Greater Idaho Falls Science Fair, April 26. He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to alarmists practicing junk science a

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds

Thu, 31 Mar 2005 14:35:59 -0800

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spac