Just thousands of funny jokes

little johnny

Little Jane climbs a tree...

Submitted by Mandy B on Thu, the 6th of June, 2002, 4:53 am

Little Jane came home from school and said, " Mommy mommy guess what? These boys wanted me to climb up a tree, so I did.

Her mom said, " You don't be a' doin' that! Those boys just wanted to see your panties!

" Ok mommy ", little Jane said.

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( category: misc -> little johnny )

Red wagon

Submitted by Ward Duncan on Thu, the 22nd of April, 2004, 12:39 am

Little Jane was sitting in her red wagon with her dad's fireman hat on, and her father walked by and said man that sure is a fine fire engine you have there.. all you need is a hose, a siren and a motor, and it would be perfect.

The next day her father walks by...

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( category: misc -> little johnny )

Blueberry Hill

Submitted by Audrey Osterman on Tue, the 30th of October, 2001, 2:48 pm

Little Johnny walked into his class and the teacher asked where he had been. he replied, " On blueberry hill.

The teacher, still confused, said, " Ok... have a seat. Another boy walked in and the teacher asked, " Where have you been. he replied, " On blueberry hill...

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( category: misc -> little johnny )

The Little Leprechan

Submitted by Samantha L Jones on Wed, the 27th of September, 2000, 9:18 pm

Litle Johnny was going to the bathroom at school. When he went to wipe his butt there was no toilet paper. So he wiped his butt with his hand and figured he could just wash his hands off. But the water wouldn't run and there was no paper towels. So he held his hand in a fist and walked back to the classroom. Then the teacher asked, " Johnny, what's in your hand?

" A little leprechan and if I open my hand he'll get away.

" Johnny, the teacher said, " if you don't tell me what's in your hand you are going to be sent to the principal's office!

Too embarrassed to open his hand, Jimmy elected to get sent to the princapal's office instead. The principal asked...

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( category: misc -> little johnny )

Bush Fans

Submitted by Jeremy Radle on Fri, the 28th of November, 2003, 9:35 am

There's a teacher in a small Texas town. She asks her class how many of them are Bush fans. Not really knowing what a Bush fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raise their hands except one boy, Little Johnny.

The teacher asks Little Johnny why he has decided to be different.

Little Johnny says, " I'm not a Bush fan.

The teacher says, " Why aren't you a Bush fan?...

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( category: misc -> little johnny )


Submitted by I Luv Jason Williams on Thu, the 27th of December, 2001, 11:38 pm

It was time for the sex talk to their kids, Little Johnny and Little Jane.

Each parent took a kid

THE mother told Little Jane that her private spot was a garage and no boy should stick their truck in it

The father took Little Johnny aside and told his piece was a truck and should be parked in a garage when he is...

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( category: misc -> little johnny )

Turn to stone

Submitted by Alex N Pimentel on Thu, the 27th of September, 2001, 9:50 pm

Little Johnny and his friend Little George walk in the woods and see a naked girl. Little George says, " Don't look at the...

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( category: misc -> little johnny )

What kids say

Submitted by Justin Collingwood on Mon, the 15th of September, 2003, 4:50 pm

' Never trust a dog to watch your food. - Patrick, aged 1 0.

' When your dad is mad and asks you, " Do I look stupid? don't answer. - Hannah, aged 9.

' Never tell your mum her diet's not working. - Michael, aged 1 4.

' Stay away from prunes. - Randy, aged 9.

' Don't squat with your spurs on. - Noronha, aged 1 3.

' Don't pull dad's finger when he tells you to. - Emily, aged 1 0.

' When your mum is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair. - Taylia, aged 1 1.

' Never allow your three-year-old brother in the same room as your school assignment. - Traci, aged 1 4.

' Don't sneeze in front of your mum when you're eating crackers. - Mitchell, aged 1 2.

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( category: misc -> little johnny )

Winnie the poo

Submitted by Marlene R Ehlers on Sun, the 25th of November, 2001, 1:41 pm

The kindergarten kids had graduated to the infant class. Their teacher wanted them to be more grown up since they were no longer in kindergarten.

She told them to use grown-up words instead of baby words. She then asked them to tell her what they did during the summer.

The first little one said he went to see his Nana.

The teacher said, ' No, no, you went to...

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( category: misc -> little johnny )

Playing trains

Submitted by cody AKAboomhower on Sat, the 24th of May, 2003, 10:00 am

A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room.

She heard the train stop and her son saying,
' All you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, ' cause this is the last stop. And all you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your arses in the train, ' cause we're going down the tracks.

The horrified mother went in and told her son,
' We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for two hours. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language.

Two hours later, the...

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( category: misc -> little johnny )
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