The wife says: I'n not upsetThe wife means: Of course I'm upset you moronThe wife says: You're ... so manlyThe wife means: You need a shave and sweat a lot

The wife says: NoThe wife means: NoThe wife says: MaybeThe wife means: NoThe wife says: I'm sorryThe wife means: You'll be sorry

Mushroom Management

Keep your employees in the dark and occasionally throw shit at them.

Diet Coke (noun)

A drink you buy at the convenience store to go with
a half pound bag of peanut M&M's

The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.

Washing Ironing, Food and Entertainment

Bernadette \burn'-a-det\: The act of torching a mortgage.Burglarize \bur'-gler-ize\: What a crook sees with.Counterfeiters \kown-ter-fit-ers\: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets

Hair Dresser (noun)

Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to
duplicate again. See "Magician".

Is unusually loyal: Wanted by no-one else.Judgement is usually sound: Lucky.Keen sense of humor: Knows lots of dirty jokes.

The wife says: You have to learn to communicate.The wife means: Just agree with me.The wife says: Are you listening to me?The wife means: [Too late, your do