1. My legions of terror will have helmets with clear plexiglass
visors, not face-concealing ones.

2. My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.

3. My nob

Recently I was watching a Ricki Lake show and like all talk
shows it shows ads for upcoming shows. The ad for this was
asking for teens to call in if they had a deep dark secret they

I wish we wernt stranded on this iceburg steven whats for dinner
we can have ratsoup ratdogs or roastrat whats for desert icetea
and snow balls.
Wait i think i can see something get

11) You end telephone conversations with the phrase, "You are
the weakest link. Goodbye!"

10) You wonder why the people at TV guide have never won the
Pulitzer Prize.

Why did Tigger get his head stuck in the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh.

If you ever find yourself in a horror movie situation.....always
remember this.

1. If you say "I'll be right right back".......you're not coming
back.

2. If you

11. I will not order my trusted lieutenant to kill the infant who is
destined to overthrow me -- I'll do it myself.

12. I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum -- a

yo mama was so stupid when she came in the house smelling bad,
she goes i better take a bath before the fire alarme goes off!!

For the first time in many years, a an old man traveled from his rural
town to the city to attend a movie. After buying his ticket, he stopped at
the concession stand to purchase some popc

31. No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort
of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and
virtually inaccessible vulnerable spot.