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lawyers

No Lawyers

Submitted by Louis Turner on Wed, the 11th of December, 2002, 3:11 pm

In Bakersfield, California, developers of the Fairway Oaks community
designed their dream homes to have 5 bedrooms, a Jacuzzi, a backyard large
enough for an in-ground pool, and NO LAWYERS! This made...

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( category: business & work -> lawyers )

Lawyer and a Doctor (Impaired of Hearing)

Submitted by Mark Kinder on Sun, the 2nd of December, 2001, 4:47 pm

A lawyer and a doctor ( both impaired of hearing ) were riding a bus in New
York, and here's an excerpt of the conversation they were having:

L: So you mentioned that you sue people all the time?
D: Yes, sewing is part of my job.
L: In that case I can give you my card, I could be useful to you.
D: Sorry we do only livers.
L: But I am alive, dont you think I qualify?
D: But you look fine to me, and I don't see a reason to cut you?
L: Well, I could sue you for saying that. I am kind of sensitive.
D...

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( category: business & work -> lawyers )

God & A Lawyer

Submitted by Caleb J Pering on Fri, the 10th of June, 2005, 10:50 pm

Q: What is the difference between God and A lawyer?

A: God doesn't think of himself as a lawyer.

( category: business & work -> lawyers )

Polution/Solution

Submitted by julian t mansfield on Sun, the 17th of April, 2005, 12:53 am

Polution- a lawyer in the sea.

Solution- all of the lawyers under the sea

( category: business & work -> lawyers )

Why Promise the Truth?

Submitted by Cheron Smith on Sun, the 2nd of February, 2003, 3:42 pm

In every single sex scandal that there is, in any court case that is, you
always have to promise...

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( category: business & work -> lawyers )

How About That

Submitted by Matt Bridges on Sun, the 18th of January, 2004, 7:18 am

Two law partners were walking down the street one day and agreed that the
first one to die would come back and help the other from beyond. As it
turned out, the older of the two did in fact die a couple of weeks later
and that left the younger lawyer all alone and very discouraged. He waited
and waited and his partner never showed any signs of contacting him. Then,
after about two months, a friend suggested he go visit a clairvoyant and
maybe receive the help he needed. The younger lawyer summoned up as much
courage as he could and found the address. After walking down a seemingly
never ending set of...

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( category: business & work -> lawyers )

Room full of lawyers

Submitted by Josh P on Fri, the 22nd of September, 2000, 9:00 pm

What do you have when you have a room full of lawyers up to
there necks in shit?

ANWSER: Not enough shit!

( category: business & work -> lawyers )

Lawyer vs. Gigolo

Submitted by kakyok on Thu, the 11th of October, 2001, 9:19 am

What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.

( category: business & work -> lawyers )

Shame

Submitted by Ronny Faiman on Mon, the 11th of September, 2000, 11:01 pm

What's the definition of a shame?
A bus of lawyers going off a cliff....

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( category: business & work -> lawyers )

A gun with 2 bullets

Submitted by Plumbum on Wed, the 28th of July, 2004, 9:09 am

Q. What do you do if you are in a room with Adolf Hitler and a lawer with
a gun and 2 bullets?

A. Shoot the lawer twice

( category: business & work -> lawyers )
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